I could be useful

So, this may seem like an inauspicious way to start a blog, but my hair is full of birdseed.

There was a coffee can full of yummy treats for the avians in the outdoor covered walkway, and I opened the side door to find it spilled everywhere. It appeared that something had used its teeth as a can-opener to pry off the plastic lid. Well, okay... raccoons get hungry too. They're a little rude and messy about it, but oh well. So I start scooping up handfuls to put back in the can, and decide to refill the bird-feeder while I'm at it. The bird-feeder is on a tall metal pole, so it can be seen from the kitchen window. By standing on a concrete block and stretching my arm over my head, I can just reach it. See where this is going?

Instead of hunting around for the plastic cup that we use for this purpose, I take a handful of birdseed and attempt to dump it into the feeder over my head. Half of it cascades down into my long, stupidly thick hair, where it somehow works its way down to the scalp and lodges immovably.

Now, either I spend half an hour brushing it out, or possibly having my daughter groom me like a monkey, or I could go out in the middle of the fields, sit very still, and see if the birds would just eat their breakfast out of my hair. I could be a human bird-feeder. Think it would work?

**reading: Shadow of the Ghost by Tanner Artesz. I'd been looking forward to this since I gave myself a teaser of the opening pages several weeks ago. It hooked me fast.

**reading aloud: The Tale of Despereaux by Kate DiCamillo. We're into the second section and the jury's still out.

**listening to: the birds. Apparently I got enough seed into the feeder that a party is warranted.